Road Rage

Every morning when I drive to work I find myself tutting or shaking my head at somebody's driving behaviour. I know I am not a perfect driver – I do drive too fast when I want to get home from work and I am inpatient when I just want to get somewhere. I tend to view driving as a means to an end – getting form A to B – rather than a pleasurable experience in itself.

Here are my top bugbears:

1) People not indicating. Taxis and Mercedes are often the worst culprits; you would have thought that Mercedes would come with indicators as standard, but apparently not. My indicator fetish extends to roundabouts and filter lanes. I see it as a common courtesy to let other drivers know of your intention to turn. This brings me onto bugbear 2…

2) Indicating does what it says on the tin. It is and indication of your intention to turn or pull out. It doesn't mean that other drivers should automatically slow down or manoeuvre out of your way. This annoys me most on motorways when people assume that just because they have indicated they are entitled to pull right in front of you, causing you to brake sharply.

3) Women flicking and preening their hair. I don't know why this annoys me but it does. This is usually observed when stopped at traffic lights or in slow moving traffic. Younger women seem to be incapable of not checking and touching their hair every thirty seconds usually when they should be watching the road. It is not uncommon to see high speed hairdressing on motorways too. I really would be surprised if Toni & Guy open a drive through hairdressers, where you pop your head out of the window for a quick cut & blow.

4) Mobile phones. Again, I like to take the moral high ground here. I never use my phone while driving – even if I have remembered to switch it on. Although it is now against the law to use a mobile while driving, this must be one of the most flouted of laws. I see people everyday chatting and laughing on their phones while driving and not just with the hands free kits that are, supposedly, safer. Van drivers are obliged to drive one handed while chatting on the phone, gesticulating at other drivers and scoffing a pie. Young people (anyone younger than me!) have to check their texts every 3 minutes, regardless of whether they are doing 60 miles an hour or not. My Victor Meldrew stance also extends to the hands free systems - I am sure these also cause you to lose concentration on the road. I just don't believe that any of these calls are so important that they cannot wait until you have stopped driving or pulled over to take the call.



5) A subset of number 4 is the Bluetooth headsets. The Borg look is cool if you are impressing your five year old with a scary story or a Star Trek inspired game, but do you really need to be constantly hooked into your phone? And if you are that indispensable that you need to be constantly contactable does this extend to when you are out of the car. Seeing a load of fat men toddling around town with their headsets always makes me a laugh. Is it that hard to put your hand in your pocket and answer the damn thing when it rings? You don’t look cool and cutting edged – you look like a wanker.

6) Litter. Probably one of the most annoying driving habits. People who thro litter out of their window as they drive along. I once drove 15 miles behind a woman who constantly ate sweets, throwing each wrapper out of the window as she drove along. I flashed her each time to indicate my annoyance, but I think she was too busy ensuring she had enough sugar in her to even notice. I have also seen a car slow as it approaches a round about to throw empty lager cans out onto the verge. What is so difficult about holding onto your rubbish until you get home?



I am sure I will remember another annoyance as I drive home today, but these are probably my top six irritants. What gets your blood boiling on the roads?